Up to this point I've made very little effort to see Batman v
Superman: Dawn of Justice. I've been a fan of Superman and Batman on the
page (and screen) for most of my conscious life, but it was clear from
previews this wasn't going to be for me. What I failed to grasp was how
totally and utterly terrible the experience would be.
It's difficult to think of any arena where this film doesn't meet with failure. At times it barely functions as a narrative film, shuffling from one sequence to the next, clumsily delivering pieces of information for future reference. I wouldn't like to say too many negative things about wardrobe or extras in the film, but nobody is spared the wrath of an ever-present layer of computer-rendered muting, damning almost all facets to condemnation.
The visual hue is evident to announce this as a Zack Snyder film, but it still stuns me the same director who so lovingly adapted Frank Miller's 300 is responsible for this! Sprinkled references to The Dark Knight Returns recall Snyder's previous passions, but the source material is so completely failed, it raises questions about how much blame the director should be allocated. The sense of a compromised vision is here. It's just a question of whether or not Snyder should've been here at all, bending to interests that weren't his.
As Warner Bros play catch-up with Marvel's superhero universe, someone probably thought it would be clever to organically sew the seeds of a Justice League sequel into the plot of Dawn of Justice. If only that were something they actually did! Commerce enters the room every time Gal Gadot is on screen, serving a sub-plot that has nothing to do with the rest of this film! It culminates in an interlude of Quicktime trailers for future DC players who are so utterly tainted by the bad taste of this film - I don't even want to think about seeing more!
No one is more soiled by the whole experience than Superman and Batman themselves. They plod and grimace their way through a film, barely motivated or engaged, full of sound & fury signifying nothing. They enter the movie idiots, long before the war is settled with a very obtuse reference to the ubiquitous "Martha": mother of macguffins.
The biggest shock of the film comes in the final act, when the obligatory rampaging CG monstrosity manages to focus the film toward something more enjoyable. Which is to say, everything in the preceding acts was so utterly miserable. This vision of Doomsday, like every other DC Comics character featured in the film, is only vaguely reminiscent of the comic book original. They managed to make a fairly shallow character even less remarkable.
Wonder Woman doesn't quite steal the show, but comes damn near close, arriving in full costume to cut a car in half, and smack the beast around without the baggage now dragging the title heroes down. Its enough to qualify as one of the three positive things I counted, but the commercial for his spin-off -- a photo -- wasn't necessary.
What were the other two positives? Laurence Fishburne isn't the Perry White of comics fame, but he's always a pleasant presence, and had a nice enough Wizard of Oz joke about Clark Kent disappearing back to Kansas. The other was the music cue for Lex Luthor. Presumably from JunkieXL's contribution, it's deliciously over the top, and could've been very fun had it been in contrast to a more crisp villain. Instead, it trips and smashes its face, accompanying an excruciatingly lame attempt to update an all-time classic.
The rest of the film is miserable. Utterly miserable. I'm stunned just how bad it is. Top to bottom: no good. During the movie I noticed I had a thorn caught in the back of my trousers and accidentally pushed it into my finger tip. That wasn't the worst thing that happened to me! The only benefit to having seen it is that there is absolutely no reason I ever need to think about it again. Except, perhaps, in my nightmares. Not to be confused with a "Knightmare", which probably should've been excised all together. Yeesh!
It's difficult to think of any arena where this film doesn't meet with failure. At times it barely functions as a narrative film, shuffling from one sequence to the next, clumsily delivering pieces of information for future reference. I wouldn't like to say too many negative things about wardrobe or extras in the film, but nobody is spared the wrath of an ever-present layer of computer-rendered muting, damning almost all facets to condemnation.
The visual hue is evident to announce this as a Zack Snyder film, but it still stuns me the same director who so lovingly adapted Frank Miller's 300 is responsible for this! Sprinkled references to The Dark Knight Returns recall Snyder's previous passions, but the source material is so completely failed, it raises questions about how much blame the director should be allocated. The sense of a compromised vision is here. It's just a question of whether or not Snyder should've been here at all, bending to interests that weren't his.
As Warner Bros play catch-up with Marvel's superhero universe, someone probably thought it would be clever to organically sew the seeds of a Justice League sequel into the plot of Dawn of Justice. If only that were something they actually did! Commerce enters the room every time Gal Gadot is on screen, serving a sub-plot that has nothing to do with the rest of this film! It culminates in an interlude of Quicktime trailers for future DC players who are so utterly tainted by the bad taste of this film - I don't even want to think about seeing more!
No one is more soiled by the whole experience than Superman and Batman themselves. They plod and grimace their way through a film, barely motivated or engaged, full of sound & fury signifying nothing. They enter the movie idiots, long before the war is settled with a very obtuse reference to the ubiquitous "Martha": mother of macguffins.
The biggest shock of the film comes in the final act, when the obligatory rampaging CG monstrosity manages to focus the film toward something more enjoyable. Which is to say, everything in the preceding acts was so utterly miserable. This vision of Doomsday, like every other DC Comics character featured in the film, is only vaguely reminiscent of the comic book original. They managed to make a fairly shallow character even less remarkable.
Wonder Woman doesn't quite steal the show, but comes damn near close, arriving in full costume to cut a car in half, and smack the beast around without the baggage now dragging the title heroes down. Its enough to qualify as one of the three positive things I counted, but the commercial for his spin-off -- a photo -- wasn't necessary.
What were the other two positives? Laurence Fishburne isn't the Perry White of comics fame, but he's always a pleasant presence, and had a nice enough Wizard of Oz joke about Clark Kent disappearing back to Kansas. The other was the music cue for Lex Luthor. Presumably from JunkieXL's contribution, it's deliciously over the top, and could've been very fun had it been in contrast to a more crisp villain. Instead, it trips and smashes its face, accompanying an excruciatingly lame attempt to update an all-time classic.
The rest of the film is miserable. Utterly miserable. I'm stunned just how bad it is. Top to bottom: no good. During the movie I noticed I had a thorn caught in the back of my trousers and accidentally pushed it into my finger tip. That wasn't the worst thing that happened to me! The only benefit to having seen it is that there is absolutely no reason I ever need to think about it again. Except, perhaps, in my nightmares. Not to be confused with a "Knightmare", which probably should've been excised all together. Yeesh!
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